ravenswept (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
ravenswept) wrote2010-07-07 11:13 pm
ravenswept) wrote2010-07-07 11:13 pm
Bowing to the popular tend
Mary Sue is you! You is Mary Sue! Today!
Okay, the task is seems is to write yourself (your real life self, mind you) into what is the most hated of literary characters, the Mary Sue. Or Gary Stu, should you be picky about naming conventions and/or a guy who doesn't like being called by female dominant names. To those, I direct you to the late Mr. Cash, and his thoughts on Sues.
Also, I'm in no way taking this seriously, and will enjoy this trash as much as possible. Like a fat kid on a cupcake.
***
The throaty laughter started deep inside, rising to the deep pitch and ringing tones that surpassed even the greatest of legendary B-movie mad scientists. It was so simple, he thought, again and again with so little effort on his part. Take a simple picture, not even with a good camera, a mere three generation old cell phone lens, and place it on any one of the many social networking sites. Within minutes he had been friended by people across the globe. How did they find him? He'd stopped asking that question years ago, figuring what worked in middle school would work outside those hallowed halls. It wasn't like he didn't have the time to practice back then, he'd hardly needed to study to pass those pedantic tests anyway.
"Yes, bask in my glory bitches, bask!"
The not-a-smile-not-a-smirk grin that had stopped so many before. Hair that perfectly spiked forward, yet had never felt the too-smooth slide of any product on the market, brushed forward and back in that devil may care fashion; so many tried to achieve, so few actually could. He didn't know where the t-shirt came from, it could've been old or new, but regardless, like all others, it fit him in such ways as to accent his physique without making it look like he was begging. Not that he wasn't proud of his body, but a sane person could only handle so many, shall we say, incidents that occur when shirtless that he erred on the side on modesty as much as possible.
He rubbed his chin, wondering if he should've shaved. What hair that did grow on his face never bothered him; why worry about what wasn't going to look bad? The goatee to sideburn look was pretty in right now anyway, no need to go beyond in effort. He stared at the screen, wondering if anyone else could make a five-year old laptop go as far and as powerful as he had. Why upgrade when you can simple make what you have go beyond anything new anyway? More and more, people wanted to know him. He chuckled again, soon he could turn the full force of this controlled public opinion on his designated targets. They would burn, if not in cyberspace then possibly in the real world, where the more, ahem, devoted would take actions into their own hands.
He didn't worry; they would never connect themselves back to him, least he himself get in trouble. And even if a connection was somehow made, he had thousands of "friends", and more by the hour. Who was he to pick even one of them apart from the pack.
"Soon. Like the tsunami pack of wolves, this wave will ravage those who I deem worthy. Or, unworthy, as the case may be." He laughed. He had made a funny. "No fourth season of Avatar the Last Airbender? Target! You leave a franchise hanging with so many unanswered questions?! You will burn, in fire! Oh, yes, your crimes with the Shyamalan will be held accountable, you cannot hide. Allow such atrocities to occur for mere pittances of simple money? TROLL, my minions, troll them until their servers crash! I have the internet, and what's more, access to that interent! My righteous opinions will be heard and made real!"
***
Hmm, perhaps I have issues.
Also, for reference:
Bask, I say! Bask!
Okay, the task is seems is to write yourself (your real life self, mind you) into what is the most hated of literary characters, the Mary Sue. Or Gary Stu, should you be picky about naming conventions and/or a guy who doesn't like being called by female dominant names. To those, I direct you to the late Mr. Cash, and his thoughts on Sues.
Also, I'm in no way taking this seriously, and will enjoy this trash as much as possible. Like a fat kid on a cupcake.
***
The throaty laughter started deep inside, rising to the deep pitch and ringing tones that surpassed even the greatest of legendary B-movie mad scientists. It was so simple, he thought, again and again with so little effort on his part. Take a simple picture, not even with a good camera, a mere three generation old cell phone lens, and place it on any one of the many social networking sites. Within minutes he had been friended by people across the globe. How did they find him? He'd stopped asking that question years ago, figuring what worked in middle school would work outside those hallowed halls. It wasn't like he didn't have the time to practice back then, he'd hardly needed to study to pass those pedantic tests anyway.
"Yes, bask in my glory bitches, bask!"
The not-a-smile-not-a-smirk grin that had stopped so many before. Hair that perfectly spiked forward, yet had never felt the too-smooth slide of any product on the market, brushed forward and back in that devil may care fashion; so many tried to achieve, so few actually could. He didn't know where the t-shirt came from, it could've been old or new, but regardless, like all others, it fit him in such ways as to accent his physique without making it look like he was begging. Not that he wasn't proud of his body, but a sane person could only handle so many, shall we say, incidents that occur when shirtless that he erred on the side on modesty as much as possible.
He rubbed his chin, wondering if he should've shaved. What hair that did grow on his face never bothered him; why worry about what wasn't going to look bad? The goatee to sideburn look was pretty in right now anyway, no need to go beyond in effort. He stared at the screen, wondering if anyone else could make a five-year old laptop go as far and as powerful as he had. Why upgrade when you can simple make what you have go beyond anything new anyway? More and more, people wanted to know him. He chuckled again, soon he could turn the full force of this controlled public opinion on his designated targets. They would burn, if not in cyberspace then possibly in the real world, where the more, ahem, devoted would take actions into their own hands.
He didn't worry; they would never connect themselves back to him, least he himself get in trouble. And even if a connection was somehow made, he had thousands of "friends", and more by the hour. Who was he to pick even one of them apart from the pack.
"Soon. Like the tsunami pack of wolves, this wave will ravage those who I deem worthy. Or, unworthy, as the case may be." He laughed. He had made a funny. "No fourth season of Avatar the Last Airbender? Target! You leave a franchise hanging with so many unanswered questions?! You will burn, in fire! Oh, yes, your crimes with the Shyamalan will be held accountable, you cannot hide. Allow such atrocities to occur for mere pittances of simple money? TROLL, my minions, troll them until their servers crash! I have the internet, and what's more, access to that interent! My righteous opinions will be heard and made real!"
***
Hmm, perhaps I have issues.
Also, for reference:
Bask, I say! Bask!