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[ravenswept]

Remember that post a few posts back, when I depressed the hell out of myself because I let my brain run to long on its own? Yeah, I seem to have the opposite problem right now.

I got nothing. Well, not true, there's thoughts, ideas, stupid short stories that I'm starting to get pissed about getting, when I have bigger projects that need work, but I let out anyway because I figure if I just go with the flow, they won't take up any more disk space and I can focus on other things, but right now...nothing.

Nothing I want to write about. Nothing that'd be interesting. It's a weird sense of wanting to just sit on the couch and stare at a blank TV until I fall asleep, all because I don't have the want to do anything better.

All this? Stream of conscious, only way to get anything down. And bloody difficult, that want to just veg and do nothingness makes typing harder than it should be.

And it whole experience right now is strange, because I do have things I could be working on. There's a short something or other, involving another nameless, faceless person, sitting alone in a room with a bottle of wine and a gun. Tigress is skimming along, most of the fixed outline is near complete. I actually have an outline for the still unnamed noir story, hopefully that takes off.

But I don't want to work on them, any of them. I don't want to force it, I've seen what happens when I attempt that. And it sucks. Sucks hard. This whole feeling does, it can go away anytime now.

One thing of note, if you want to call it that, is apparently I'll have to really bring out the big guns should I decide to go any further with that attempt horror story. That one, just a few entries downward. Yeah, I posted it on a_soc_k to see what kind of reaction I'd get off it, and god damn we have some jaded readers out there.

I can't say I blame them, I'm not too happy with it myself, looking back. Bad experiment, I think, trying to capture in a first-person perspective entirely in dialog. That, and following Saw, Hostel, and (don't blame me if you look this up, limiinal is the one who pointed me towards it) The Human Centipede, I'd have a lot of work making it something that actually be scary, or at least frightening. Especially in words, there are details that just are so much more... squicky when seen visually.

And Clive Barker has already beaten me to that punch. Hellraiser and all that.

But I'm starting to think I'm getting settled in first-person a bit. It's easy, falling into the mind of someone else. Not easy, always, getting that into words, but it's fun trying to convey how this person thinks, without actually saying it. Which is why I like the noir story more, it's a strange and fascinating dynamic where what she says and what she's thinking are often two different things. Or opposite things. Or the same, but still a lie. Maybe it helps that I know how it ends.

Okay, I've rambled enough. I mainly wanted to get something down here, I missed my self-appointed Wed deadline. I'd feel bad if I missed two in a row. Maybe.

Comments

[stripeblue.livejournal.com]

Honestly, I think it's easier to show how things are disturbing with visuals, yes, but fucked up personalities are shown better on paper. I don't read an awful lot, but looking at characters like Carcer (Terry Pratchett), Arren (The Dark Griffin), anything involving Shinji (Like, even some fanfiction, ohmy god), you can see that they're a bit screwy. Don't sweat about jaded readers, write what you love and how you want to do it.

The way that passage is written allows for readers to really take a nosedive into the character's head - it's brilliant. And I'm sure you have plenty of fucked up people whose minds are ready to be displayed in all their screwiness. :'D

Don't give up and keep on truckin'. :D And sorry if I missed what you were trying to say completely. >_>

[ravenswept.livejournal.com]

I will neither confirm or deny the multitude of voices in my head who may and may not disagree with you, depending on what they're feeling that day.

You didn't miss it, I'm just trying to figure out how to more rightly attack that story idea. It was just one of many things going through my head that day.

[echostar.livejournal.com]

Something for inspiration if you have not heard them before.

A group called the Protomen have made a rock Opera about a gritty, grim-dark Megaman setting. It is awesome.. and I have been meaning to send it to you or a while. I know the music has helped me break through some artist block lately.
Act II: Father of Death; The Good Doctor
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HP2NePWJ2pQ
Act II: The Father of Death; Light Up the Night
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UpSHC1dqX1o
If you like it, James an I have both their CDs and I can make a copy to send to you.

Take a few deep breaths and relax. Sometimes you will have to force it.. but if you don't need to now, then don't. Let your mind calm down and don't stress on it or you will only make it worse. *hug*

[ravenswept.livejournal.com]

80s rock opera! Kickass! Copies would rock hard, I give many thanks!

This wasn't stress, it was...lack...of stress. Frankly I'm starting to think this journal is turning a bit too emo, and I may need to kick my own ass to stop lingering on things that aren't helping anything.

Also, sadly, I don't think I'm gonna be able to make it to PAX (GARRRR!!) due to money issues presently pecking at me like a vulture. That dissappoint aside, as soon as I can, I am coming up for a visit.

[limiinal.livejournal.com]

I think it's a good thing to let your focus slip to short stories. You're still being productive, and there's not as much effort wasted if one turns out flawed or worthless.

Especially in words, there are details that just are so much more... squicky when seen visually."

Gotta say, I always find what isn't revealed to be more terrifying than what is. I mean, the short synopsis I read of The Human Centipede scared the ever living fuck out of me, because my imagination drew up a whole bunch of scenarios. Then when I saw the trailer and how the actual -- uh, attachment -- happened, I just thought, "Oh. And that isn't medically feasible! Two would die from lack of nutrients in days!"

Er. Anyway, my point is, if you tried a format like the madman (or madwoman) writing into a diary, you could still use that great first-person/craziness leaking through mixture while making it feel less visual.

[ravenswept.livejournal.com]

*chuckle* Yeah, it's medically feasible to some degree, but you have to ask "what's the point" and "ew". And to some degree that's what Canvas would be going for... only taking "human centipede" a bit more literally. I read that if he can garner enough interest, the director wants to make a sequel with 12 people making up the centipede. o.O

Never thought about a diary... maybe not as the whole thing (though that'd make an interesting side project for the whole thing) but with snippets from the diary in front of each chapter... that could work, thanks!