Remember that post a few posts back, when I depressed the hell out of myself because I let my brain run to long on its own? Yeah, I seem to have the opposite problem right now.

I got nothing. Well, not true, there's thoughts, ideas, stupid short stories that I'm starting to get pissed about getting, when I have bigger projects that need work, but I let out anyway because I figure if I just go with the flow, they won't take up any more disk space and I can focus on other things, but right now...nothing.

Nothing I want to write about. Nothing that'd be interesting. It's a weird sense of wanting to just sit on the couch and stare at a blank TV until I fall asleep, all because I don't have the want to do anything better.

All this? Stream of conscious, only way to get anything down. And bloody difficult, that want to just veg and do nothingness makes typing harder than it should be.

And it whole experience right now is strange, because I do have things I could be working on. There's a short something or other, involving another nameless, faceless person, sitting alone in a room with a bottle of wine and a gun. Tigress is skimming along, most of the fixed outline is near complete. I actually have an outline for the still unnamed noir story, hopefully that takes off.

But I don't want to work on them, any of them. I don't want to force it, I've seen what happens when I attempt that. And it sucks. Sucks hard. This whole feeling does, it can go away anytime now.

One thing of note, if you want to call it that, is apparently I'll have to really bring out the big guns should I decide to go any further with that attempt horror story. That one, just a few entries downward. Yeah, I posted it on a_soc_k to see what kind of reaction I'd get off it, and god damn we have some jaded readers out there.

I can't say I blame them, I'm not too happy with it myself, looking back. Bad experiment, I think, trying to capture in a first-person perspective entirely in dialog. That, and following Saw, Hostel, and (don't blame me if you look this up, limiinal is the one who pointed me towards it) The Human Centipede, I'd have a lot of work making it something that actually be scary, or at least frightening. Especially in words, there are details that just are so much more... squicky when seen visually.

And Clive Barker has already beaten me to that punch. Hellraiser and all that.

But I'm starting to think I'm getting settled in first-person a bit. It's easy, falling into the mind of someone else. Not easy, always, getting that into words, but it's fun trying to convey how this person thinks, without actually saying it. Which is why I like the noir story more, it's a strange and fascinating dynamic where what she says and what she's thinking are often two different things. Or opposite things. Or the same, but still a lie. Maybe it helps that I know how it ends.

Okay, I've rambled enough. I mainly wanted to get something down here, I missed my self-appointed Wed deadline. I'd feel bad if I missed two in a row. Maybe.